Is cybering cheating?

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dkaksl
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#11 » Wed Jul 11, 2012 12:51 pm

Thanks for the quick reply. It's a topic close to my heart. I'm really curious what motivations people have (if they have any).

BlueJay
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#12 » Sat Jul 06, 2013 5:25 am

Yep. It can vary from person to person and religion isn't necessarily a root cause. I myself am atheist, but I'm a very monogamous person. I would expect in any progression of a relationship I'm in that at some point we reach a point of exclusivity, and if my partner disagreed, then we probably aren't right for each other in the long term and it would end, or at least only continue on as a friendship. What my friends do with other consenting adults is their business and has no bearing on the friendship.

But then again, I know some people who are married and are still polyamorous. They have a mutual lover, and each feel free to explore dating other people as well. This apparently works for them, and that's fine. They both made that clear from the start.

Basically, if you are doing something that you feel you have to hide from your significant other, you are doing something wrong, and that isn't the same from person to person.

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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#13 » Fri Aug 09, 2013 10:45 am

(I'm assuming because the traffic is relatively low that there is no expiry on threads)

As others have stated, cheating is a concept that is completely arbitrary so it can only be relative to your expectations. To add though, this depends on not just her expectations but also yours. If you form the opinion that this is not cheating, then you would also conclude that if your spouse disagrees and believes it is in fact cheating, she is incorrect and probably not the right person for you.

To follow this theme further, I would say that I disagree with Solider that between in love is overrated, but that because my definition (and what I understand my wife to believe) of 'love' would imply trust and exclusiveness.
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Sephiroth9611
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#14 » Fri Aug 09, 2013 4:21 pm

The Slider wrote:As others have stated, cheating is a concept that is completely arbitrary so it can only be relative to your expectations. To add though, this depends on not just her expectations but also yours. If you form the opinion that this is not cheating, then you would also conclude that if your spouse disagrees and believes it is in fact cheating, she is incorrect and probably not the right person for you.

This paragraph encapsulates exactly why even agnostics/atheists are willing to support Christian morality. As I noted in my previous post, there is a clear Christian position regarding cybering and cheating since it is 'of the mind'. Christian morality has been the default in the West for centuries. But a person's moral compass is as valid as the next person's. There is no higher authority than a person's own self and once enough people agree, anything can change. Anything.
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#15 » Mon Sep 30, 2013 8:26 am

It is cheating regardless of what kind of religion you believe in unless it is noted that you are infact both okay with it and both parties are fine with it. But if you must hide it, or ask is it cheating then it is. The problem becomes you are looking for something elsewhere that your mate can provide be it physical, mental or emotional. Open communication and trust are the keys for a relationship to grow, without those its like a plant who receives no water to grow, it will soon die.
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#16 » Mon Sep 30, 2013 5:17 pm

Slim Kracka wrote:It is cheating regardless of what kind of religion you believe in unless it is noted that you are infact both okay with it and both parties are fine with it.

So are you saying that as long as Christian Boy X and Christian Girl Y agree cheating is okay, then religion doesn't count in the equation? In other words, religion for you is a personal philosophy rather than being Absolute Truth until Itself?
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Cloud Strife
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#17 » Tue Oct 01, 2013 3:49 am

Sephiroth9611 wrote:
Slim Kracka wrote:It is cheating regardless of what kind of religion you believe in unless it is noted that you are infact both okay with it and both parties are fine with it.

So are you saying that as long as Christian Boy X and Christian Girl Y agree cheating is okay, then religion doesn't count in the equation? In other words, religion for you is a personal philosophy rather than being Absolute Truth until Itself?



I always loved reading your debates. The thing becomes who am I say what is personal philosophy or absolute truth. My outlook is cheating is wrong however you cut it. I won't agree and say cheating is okay because like you I prefer her vaginal walls are mine and whatnot if we are dating. Again if both parties think it is okay and they are okay with said circumstances then to me that is their business. Personally, it's none of my business what other people do or think. I do believe in karma and it's ways do in fact create waves. To you it may count in the equation but to someone else it may not. Cheating is wrong. I just refuse to tell someone they are wrong because religion said so. It kinda like someone forcing there beliefs down your throat in my eyes.
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Sephiroth9611
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#18 » Tue Oct 01, 2013 9:21 pm

I broke up what you posted and rearranged it a bit since it was a bit disorganized.

Cloud Strife wrote:My outlook is cheating is wrong however you cut it.

A laudable outlook.

Cloud Strife wrote:I won't agree and say cheating is okay because like you I prefer her vaginal walls are mine and whatnot if we are dating.

SOLDIER said that, not me.

Cloud Strife wrote:The thing becomes who am I say what is personal philosophy or absolute truth.

Cloud Strife wrote:Personally, it's none of my business what other people do or think.

Cloud Strife wrote:Again if both parties think it is okay and they are okay with said circumstances then to me that is their business.

So you are denying even the existence of a natural law? What if those people are hurting other people?

Cloud Strife wrote:I do believe in karma and it's ways do in fact create waves. To you it may count in the equation but to someone else it may not.

So you are saying that you believe in something, but deny that it has any purpose? If you believe in karma does what we normally think of when we think of karma, then you must think it exists and does what it does regardless of whether someone else counts in the equation. Do you believe that these waves affect other people regardless of if they believe in them?

Cloud Strife wrote:Cheating is wrong. I just refuse to tell someone they are wrong because religion said so. It kinda like someone forcing there beliefs down your throat in my eyes.

If a child reaches out to touch a hot pan, would you prevent the child from doing so in order to prevent the child from being burned? Why would you do this?
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Cloud Strife
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Re: Is cybering cheating?

Post#19 » Mon Oct 14, 2013 3:08 am

Sorry kinda hard to keep it together on a cellphone.


So you are denying even the existence of a natural law? What if those people are hurting other people?


I'm not denying the existence of any laws, just saying people are entitled to their way of doing things. I believe what is done is undone to you. Moreso saying Karma is a bitch who doesn't play nice. I merely find it bothersome to tell other people how they should live there life ya know? As far as it is going with hurting people, I don't agree that anyone should be hurt and that is wrong. Matters of the heart should not be toyed with. Again I agree but also think it's none of my business.



So you are saying that you believe in something, but deny that it has any purpose? If you believe in karma does what we normally think of when we think of karma, then you must think it exists and does what it does regardless of whether someone else counts in the equation. Do you believe that these waves affect other people regardless of if they believe in them?



I never said it didn't have a purpose. That's why I said people can make up their own minds, just because I think it's wrong and believe in Karma doesn't mean the next person who is hurting someone by cheating will listen to me or care what I think. I think the waves do effect other people greatly but if both parties are on the same page about seeing other people while seeing each other then I believe karma nulls itself in a weird twist honestly but again it boils down to personal belief and I firmly believe those shouldn't be forced upon people. Like hellfire and brimstone will reign down on you if you don't believe in god for example and I think it's in poor taste to force it upon people. So it depends on who you ask.


If a child reaches out to touch a hot pan, would you prevent the child from doing so in order to prevent the child from being burned? Why would you do this?

[/quote]

See this is different. That is a child who would need to be protected. And taught what would happen if they touch a hot pan. So yes I would prevent it. But when we are talking about TWO grown people who KNOW the ramifications of cheating and that it is wrong (common sense would say they know it's wrong but again there are some people in the world who lack it, so with that being said) I won't cheat. I would prevent the kid from burning themselves because I would wanna protect them from harm. But we know at some point in that kids life, they are gonna experience heartache, and pain, and shit but I can't protect them from everything. I can show them the right from the wrong but at some point the kid will have to make their own decisions and live with them. I'm a perfect example of being taught right from wrong but I HAVE done alot of wrong and for years have been trying to right my wrongs and I have no one to blame but myself. So care to tell me your point?
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